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Black One Liners
Q: Why are aspirins white? A: Because they work. Q: How did the black girl know her mother was on the rag? A: Her brothers dick tasted funny. Q: What has six legs and goes: "Ho-de-do, ho-de-do, ho-de-do"? A: Three blacks running for the elevator. Q: What's the definition of the word "Confusion"? A: Father's day in Harlem. Q: Do you know why so many blacks were killed in Vietnam? A: Because every time the seargeant said: "Get down!" they stood up and started dancing. Q: What did God say when he saw the first black person? A: Ooops, I burnt one! Q: Why is Stevey Wonder Smiling all the time? A: He doesn't know he's black. Q: Blacks took over Toys R us. A: The renamed it to We B toys. Q: A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. A: It's called Nacho Mama. Q: What do you get when you cross an Eskimo with a black person? A: A Snowblower that Doesn't work! Q: What do you call an Negro with a peg leg? A: Shit on a stick. Q: What does an apple and a Negro have in common? A: They both look soooo pretty hanging from a tree. Q: How do you starve a black man? A: Put his food stamps in his work boots. Q: Why don't blacks like Tylenol? A: They have to pick cotton to get to them. Q: What did the black women get for getting an abortion? A: Fat cash from crime stoppers. Q: What does a black person get for Christmas? A: Your bike!!! Q: How do you keep black people out of your back yard? A: Hang one in the front!! Q: What is the difference between a black and a bucket of shit? A: The bucket. Q: Why do you never hit a black on a bike? A: Because it is probably your bike. Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Because their knee grows. Q: Why do black people wear hats covering their face? A: So the birds don't shit on their lips. Q: What is white with a black asshole? A: The A-Team Q: How many black people does it take to single a roof? A: Depends on how thin you slice um. Q: How many black people does it take to pave a road? A: Depends on how heavy the roller is. Q: When is the only time u concentrate on a black man. A: Behind the eyepiece of your rifle. Q: What's the difference between batman and a blackman? A: Batman can go to the store with out robin. Q: What's the difference between shit and a black? A: Eventually Shit turns white and stops stinking. Q: Is it better to be born black or gay? A: Black - because you don't have to tell your folks. Q: How do they say "fuck you" in Los Angeles? A: Trust me. Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car wreck. Q: How many blacks does it take to clean a toilet? A: None, it's a woman's job. Q: What's the definition of black foreplay? A: Don't scream or I'll kill you. Q: How do you know Adam and Eve weren't black? A: Ever try and take a rib from a black. Q: Who won the race down the tunnel, the black or the Pole? A: The Pole because the black had to stop to write "motherfucker" on the wall. Q: What do you get when you cross a black and a groundhog? A: 6 more weeks of basketball season. Q: Why do blacks always have sex on their minds? A: Because of the pubic hair on their heads. Q: Did you hear about the new black French restaurant? A: It's called Chez What. Q: What did Lincoln say after his five day drunk? A: I freed whom. Q: What's long, black and smelly? A: The unemployment line. Q: Why don't blacks like blowjobs? A: They don't like any jobs. Q: What do you get when you cross a black prostitute with a Chinese woman? A: A broad that sucks shirts. Q: Why do blacks raise chickens? A: To teach their kids how to walk. Q: How do you make a black nervous? A: Take him to an auction. Q: What do you call a black prostitute with braces? A: A black and Decker pecker wrecker. Q: What do you call a black test tube baby? A: Janitor in a drum. Q: Why do blacks smell so bad? A: So the blind can hate them too. Q: How did they invent break dancing? A: Trying to steal the hubcaps off a moving car. Q: Why did God invent golf? A: So white people could dress up like blacks. Q: What do you call a black man in Thailand? A: A tycoon. Q: Why do blacks keep their fly's open? A: In case they have to count to eleven. Q: What do you call a black man in a tree? A: A branch manager. Q: What's the most confusing day in Harlem? A: Father's day. Q: Who are the two most famous black women in history? A: Aunt Jemima and Mutha Fucker. Q: How do you stop a black baby from crying? A: Wet his lips and stick him to the wall. Q: Did you hear that the KKK bought the movie rights to Roots? A: They're going to play it backwards so it has a happy ending. Q: What do you call 4 blacks in a 57 chevy? A: Blood vessel. Q: Why do blacks wear white gloves? A: So they don't bite their fingers eating tootsie rolls. Q: What is black and has four legs and goes Hol De Doe, Hol De Doe? A: Two blacks running for the elevator. Q: Why did God invent the climax? A: So blacks would know when to stop fucking. Q: Why did so many blacks get killed in the war? A: When the Colonel yelled get down, they all got up and danced. Q: What's the definition of worthless? A: A 7'2" black man with a small prick, that can't play basketball. Q: What do you call a black with a new bike? A: A thief. Q: What do you call a black with a new caddie? A: A better thief. Q: Why don't black kids jump on their beds? A: Because they'll stick to the velcro on the ceiling. Q: How do you get them down once they're stuck? A: Tell Mexican kids they're pinatas. Q: Did you hear about Klu Klux Kneivel? A: He tried to jump over 8 blacks with a steam roller. Q: How can you tell when a black as been on your computer? A: It is not there. Q: What do you call a black with no arms? A: Trustworthy. Q: Why do black women where high heels? A: So their knuckles don't drag. Q: What do you call a black guys condom? A: A duffle bag. Q: Why are black guys eyes red after sex? A: From the pepper spray. Q: What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10,000 black guys? A: Warden. Q: What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A: The quarterback. Q: Whats wrong with 5 blacks driving a Cadillac off of a cliff? A: The car holds 6. Q: How do you get a black man out of a tree? A: Cut the rope. Q: What do you call a black person on birth-control? A: Crime prevention. |